I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize
