But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
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