I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
Randomize
