take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Randomize
