Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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