Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Randomize
