your thong is hanging out like whoa
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
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