Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
