If i come over, it means nothing
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
My life is pants optional.
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