I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
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