She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
Randomize