That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize
