whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
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