at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
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