would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
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