The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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