just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
