Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Randomize
