Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
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