By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
Randomize
