They have a pepper shaker for pot.
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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