i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
Randomize
