Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
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