Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
But break dance skills will only take you so far
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
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