Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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