Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Randomize
