I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Randomize
