you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
Randomize
