i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
