Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
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