Walk of Shame. In a state park.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
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