ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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