Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
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