It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
