those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
Randomize
