I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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