I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
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