I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
