Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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