Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
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his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
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