if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
Randomize
