you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
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