Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
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