And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize