girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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