you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
