is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
I'm sorry, our booty call lines closed at 2 am. If you are receiving this message it is our off hours. Please try again between the hours of 12pm and 2 am to reschedule your booty call. Thank you for your cooperation.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Randomize
