Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
Hello my rib-scented angel!
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Randomize
