Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
Randomize
