it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Randomize