Me. At least after what I've been through.
She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
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